I’ll have to admit it. I’ve had a Senior Moment. For all this time, I was thinking something happened in 1993 that happened in 1992. In my defense, I wasn’t there so it isn’t burned forever in my brain. Not that I wouldn’t have liked to have been there but it didn’t work out that way.
Some time before 1992, DS2 was a popular fellow in his own right. He dated first this one and that one and settled down with one person for awhile. That didn’t last, though.
After he moved back to Tennessee, he met a young woman who was enrolled in a business program at the university and they became an Item. He brought her to Meet Mom, DD, and the grandparents. We all approved.
He was so proud of her. She was a bright spot in his life. Whenever they came up, he had something new to report that he/she/they had done.
One winter day close to Christmas, they came to visit. It was whizzin’ cold, as my mother used to say. The temperature was down in the single digits and things left outside almost immediately froze. It had to be the Christmas after I got laid off from my factory job because I had bought citrus juicers for just about everyone I knew. The juicers were manufactured by that company, Oster. In addition to the juicers, I gave each of the giftees a box of oranges.
Not wanting to take time to put the oranges in his car, DS2 put them on the back steps at the Folks’ house while he and she went inside to say hello. I immediately went in and got him to put the oranges where they wouldn’t freeze. I probably overreacted. They probably wouldn’t have frozen in that quickly but I was broke and those oranges were a large part of my spending money.
As we spent time together and got more and more acquainted, I could see why my son was drawn to the young woman. She was (is) beautiful, smart and gifted. I thought she would make a good addition to our family but he seemed to be in no hurry. Not wanting to push, I kept my feelings to myself.
By and by, he began thinking seriously about the future. They started making plans and had the church picked out. It was a little country chapel, very picturesque. She had selected her dress and everything was going according to plan. It wasn’t going to be a big wedding. There would just be family and close friends. I liked that idea, too. Then Circumstance reared its ugly head and it was Postpone Time.
Now what? When would they be married? I was all primed to go be the Mother of the Groom and nothing was happening.
One day, the phone rang and it was DS2’s intended. She isn’t usually one to mince words but she seemed to be having a hard time deciding what to say. I wondered if she and DS2 were history but I didn’t say anything. I let her talk. Finally, she got it out. She was my daughter-in-law. What?? When??? How?? Yes, they were married. Two weeks before. It was a civil ceremony with no family or friends present.
At first, I was hurt that they had done it that way but as I thought about it more, I came to terms with it. They were as married as they would have been with all the ceremony and embellishments and this was a lot less stress. All of us can use less stress.
The next time I saw them, it was as a married couple. She was really and truly my daughter-in-law. I was a mother-in-law! That was a new role for me and I was determined not to be a meddler or try to direct their lives in any way. I prayed for them daily. I had from the beginning so that wasn’t a change.
For a long time, they had lived in a trailer up on a hill that had a resident snake in the closet in the bathroom. I dubbed it Hector. It was on to house-hunting and they found a nice place on some acreage near the railroad tracks.
DIL2 (even though she was my first daughter-in-law, she is DS2’s wife) had a good job at a bank and DS2 was working as well. They took the plunge and became property owners.
There were no children in the offing but DS2 had always loved animals. When he was growing up, he wanted to be a veterinarian. That never worked out but he had pets. There was the huge aquarium with salt water fish. He had his pit bull, Dammit, who was one of the sweetest dogs I’ve ever known. Then they added a Rottweiler named Nikki to the menagerie.
People kept asking me when they were going to have a baby. I’d say whenever they were ready. It’s a huge undertaking to have a child and I had nothing to urge. It had to be their decision.
Life rocked on for all of us and passed by DS1’s wedding and it was on to DD’s 8th grade graduation. And what a project that turned out to be! It dwarfed just about everything that had gone on before.
Note: DS2 doesn’t want his picture published.