Awful Is a Weak Word.

I feel worse than awful. Two days ago, my summary was, “I could probably feel worse but I don’t want to find out.” Today, I’ve found out and it isn’t pleasant.

Feeling better yesterday was a tease. I put fava beans to soak last night thinking I would feel up to cooking and pureeing them. I made myself do it but it wasn’t because I felt like it. I had to.

I’d been up long enough to drink my two large glasses of water and take my thyroid meds when I had to lie back down. I was a bit embarrassed when the doorbell rang and I had to go answer it, still in my robe. It was my cousin’s twin (who is also my cousin). He’d cleared a lot of the overgrowth away from the deck. Later, I took a bath and got dressed but that’s as far as I’ve gotten. Nothing has been done to get the house in shape.

During all this time of being nauseous, I’ve pushed through and exercised. I couldn’t do that today. My first (and only) meal was after 3 p.m. TT. I counted six avocados in my fridge and knew there was no way I could handle even a bite. Loading up four, I took them to my CIL and found he’s been vomiting yesterday and today. Maybe I have a bug?

My one meal of the day was a bit of soup out of the freezer with some saffron rice I dumped together. Like a nut, I bought 25 one lub bags of kelp noodles and they really really need to be eaten. I heated some of the fava beans and put the noodles in them and ate that, too. To, hopefully, settle my stomach, I’ve been eating ginger.

Twinkle is sitting at my feet, concerned that I’m not doing anything.

I’ve been wondering about the results of my tests so I called the specialist’s office and got what I could. The CT shows no nodules or malignancies which is a relief. The only things that aren’t back yet are the tests that were done in the same building where the specialist is. Strange. My pulmonary function test indicates interstitial lung disease. However, I have never done well on those tests.

Prayer meeting is tonight and I fully intended to go. One of my friends told me she and her husband would come by and get me any time I wanted. If they’d carried me to the car and into the church, I don’t think I could have handled sitting in a pew for the hour or so it’s supposed to last.

Genese let me know her hearing aid wasn’t found by the linen company. She’s asking the housekeeping supervisor to write a statement to that effect. When the form is notarized, it will be sent in and a new hearing aid will be sent to the audiologist for adjustment.

Speaking of hearing aids, I haven’t been wearing mine much. I haven’t felt like it. If tomorrow is a better day, maybe I can get back into it.

It isn’t even 6:30 yet but I’m going to lie down. Maybe I’ll go to sleep and maybe I won’t. Time will tell. If I do anything I make the bed and it is still unmade. What is a good word to express how I feel? Horrible? Might be. I know for sure I’m weak.

4 Responses to Awful Is a Weak Word.

  1. Lila August 28, 2013 at 8:54 pm #

    Sorry for your neighbor, but it’s proof that something is “going around” and maybe you’ll be feeling better soon. I’ll keep praying for you! So happy for the good results from the CT scan. Good news, indeed!

    • Tommie August 29, 2013 at 4:09 am #

      I believe mine is gallbladder. This isn’t as bad as the attack I had at Mother’s but it’s lasting longer.

  2. Mary Jane August 29, 2013 at 9:57 am #

    My last gallbladder attack made me think I was having a heart attack.I woke my husband at about 4:00 a.m., after hurting all night, to take me to the emergency room, where I got tested and x-rayed, etc. Soon thereafter I had the offending organ removed in outpatient surgery. No more gallbladder pains!

    • Tommie August 29, 2013 at 10:30 am #

      If there’s anyone out there who has never been cursed with an unhappy gallbladder, there is no comparison with anything else. I hope I can soon join the ranks of those without.

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