Raw vegans don’t get sick.

When I became a raw foodist, I learned a new vocabulary. Raw vegans don’t get sick. The body is cleaning house (I referred to that a few days ago), it’s detoxing, or there’s a cleansing crisis.

When the house cleaning is going on, the bacteria invade, find a weak spot, and latch on. At that time, the bugs are our friends, I guess. They slurp up the wimpy stuff and they, in turn, get slurped up by our white blood cells. When all the slurping is complete, the house is clean and I go on with my normal business and feel perky again.

A detox takes place when the body decides to get rid of poisons (toxins) that can have built up over a period of years. It can be gunk from eating meat, drinking alcohol, smoking, or simply eating bad cooked food. Once again, when the stuff is gone, I (or whoever) get back to high energy and well-being.

The cleansing crisis is much like a detox. As a matter of fact, I think the difference is more in the terminology than in fact. It might be that it comes on more quickly and leaves sooner. I don’t know.

I have been taught to “listen to my body” which isn’t a bad thing. I have become much more observant than I used to be. As a matter of fact, my level of “listening” impressed a long-time raw foodist who teaches others to do just that. I have always, to a point, practiced noticing what is going on with my innards but not like I have for the past two and a half years. This has been heightened by the fact that I am mostly chemical-free. Before, I could never know if it was me or something I’d taken. Now I can tell the difference.

BUT, I am 64 years old. I was 61 when I first started eating only raw food. To me, whether my body is housecleaning, detoxing, or having a cleansing crisis, I am sick. From the time I was hatched, if I felt puny, I was sick. If I was throwing up, I was sick. If I was coughing, I was sick. I had a lot of experience with being sick. My mother loved me deeply and she could never say no to anything I wanted to eat no matter what it was. There was no problem that I might want to eat a dead animal. That never crossed my mind. Give me fried potatoes ‘n onions, fried eggs loaded with garlic, pie and cookies, macaroni and cheese. I didn’t care for cake and ice cream (I developed a taste for them later). I spent lots of time in the doctor’s office with sore throats, colds, and he came and saw me when I had scarlet fever so bad my bones ached. I was tanked up on penicillin (oral—I had a bad reaction to an injection when I was six) more often than not. My tonsils and adenoids were removed when I was seven. A tab was left on the right side and one tonsil grew back. (What is it if you have tonsillitis in one tonsil?)

I had bladder infections, kidney infections, my near miss with rheumatic fever made my doctor brother-in-law fear I had heart damage. My skin was bad, my hair thin and wispy, my teeth were pretty much rotten. I was clumsy. I fell when I was six and knocked my two front teeth out on a tree root. When my teeth came in, I fell again and broke one of them. Two weeks later, I fell and broke it some more and chipped the other one. Consequently, I was in the dentist’s office frequently.

Now, I don’t blame my mother for any of this. She was misguided to let me eat what I pleased but it’s been an education. Later on, I tried to do better by my children but I lapsed a lot into Junk Food Land. It was a radical 180 for me to start eating raw vegan. No wonder it was a shock to so many people! Someone has said if you don’t learn from an experience, it’s been a total waste. I don’t regard my first 60 years as a waste.

That being said, I am sick. I don’t care if my body is cleaning house, detoxing, or going through a cleansing crisis. I’m sick. I stayed in bed during my exercise time this morning and got to work 15 minutes late. At 12:15, I told my boss that I was going to leave early “like five minutes ago.” She told me to get out of there and go home.

I did make a couple of stops to get food and was in the house and in a tub of very warm water shortly. The bed was calling me so I lay down for a little over an hour. According to raw protocol, I should be fasting but I’ve been eating.

Tomorrow will be another day. If I don’t feel 100% better, I’ll spend it at home. I was listening to the news and France requires 31 days of vacation plus holidays. I could handle that.